Not Just a Phobia
by beatlechicksteph
Summary: Ron returns to his flat to find that his roommate has decorated it for Halloween with his worst fear.


**Written for Marvelously Magical's Something Wicked 2019.**

**Prompt: Character A hates spiders and creepy crawly things. Character B thinks the best thing about Halloween is all the creepy crawly decorations. An argument over how to decorate their flat for Halloween could spell the end of their friendship/relationship**

Ron rubbed his eyes as he walked up the last flight of stairs to his shared flat. He wished he could just apparate directly into the flat, but his flatmate was a Muggle, and even though she was used to less than normal things, she hated when he would just appear in the flat. And Hermione asked him to be considerate of her feelings.

He was in America with Hermione while she finished an internship with some Muggle law enforcement team, SHIELD. She was trying to advance through her department in the Ministry, and they said if she did this internship she would become the department head, and her workload would decrease dramatically, which would open the door for them to finally start a family, something they had both wanted desperately, but between him running the Hogsmeade joke shop and her trying to get to a point in her career where she wasn't doing all the grunt work of the department, it was never the right time. But now, with her almost to the point where she could work a lot less, and the Hogsmeade shop doing well enough they were able to hire some more help, it was time.

But first, they needed to get through this internship. Hermione was learning a bunch of muggle technology advancement stuff from someone named Tony Stark, and when she told him she had to travel to New York for half a year to do it, he immediately talked to George about going with his wife. George immediately agreed, and Angelina said she would take over for him for the time being. However, when they arrived, they learned Hermione would need to stay on site at Avenger's Tower, but Ron couldn't stay with them. But he could stay nearby with another civilian, Darcy Lewis, who was an assistant to one of the other scientists on the team.

He and Darcy got on okay, but it helped that they were rarely in the flat at the same time as well. He was out exploring the city, and hanging out at the local joke shop talking about business ideas, or spending time with Hermione, and Darcy was always in the lab helping Jane do whatever it was they did. While he wished he could stay on site with his wife, he was appreciative his temporary home was welcoming.

He unlocked the door to the flat and let out a very undignified scream. It was as if the flat had been invaded. By spiders.

"Bloody Hell!" he exclaimed backing back out of the door into the hallway.

Darcy came around the corner from her bedroom. "What's wrong, Red?" she said.

"What the Hell happened to the flat?" he said, gesturing at the giant spiderweb that now stretched across the top of the door way and sported a large, black spider.

"It's October 1st!" she said, cheerily. "Time to decorate for Halloween! So I pulled out my decorations and put them up."

Ron shook his head. "Halloween? This is how you chose to decorate for Halloween? These disgusting creatures aren't Halloween decorations. Where are the pumpkins and the gourds? Or the ghosts? Why are there so many spiders?!"

Darcy laughed. "Are you scared of spiders, Red?"

"YES!" Ron shouted, empathetically. "Yes, I am. I've always been not fond of them, but almost getting eaten by a giant one in the forest when I was twelve really cemented by phobia into a justified fear."

Darcy laughed. "You were almost eaten by a spider? That's hilarious."

"No, no it wasn't hilarious it was bloody terrifying. If our flying car didn't rescue us, I would be in the belly of a spider right now."

Darcy laughed even harder. "Just get in the damn apartment, Red. The spiders are fake. They're not going to hurt you."

Ron shook his head. "I'm not going in there as long as there are hundreds of spiders all over the flat," he pulled out his wand. "Let me just transfigure them into something else, bats or ghosts and then I'll come in."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Put that stick away right this minute, mister. You are not messing with my decorations. This is my apartment, you are a guest. So, I'm going to decorate it however I want."

"You're right, I am a guest. So, your job is to make me feel welcome and at home. Making it so that I am terrified to step foot in the flat is the opposite of making me feel at home," Ron said.

Darcy growled. Actually growled. "Oh, just get over it, Red. They are made of plastic. Just get your ass in here."

Ron narrowed his eyes, and cast his Patronis. "Love, I'm coming back, my flat has become uninhabitable, we'll need to find me another place to stay for the last half of your internship."

As his terrier sprinted off to find his wife, it was Darcy's turn to narrow her eyes. "Did you just tattle on me to your wife?"

"I didn't tattle to my wife," Ron defended. "I told her that I can't live here, and that's the truth. If you're going to keep these spiders everywhere, I'm not going to be able to stay here without having nightmares."

"They. Are. Spiders." Darcy bit out. "And fake. I think you're being a bit over dramatic."

"Um, did you miss the part where I told you I was almost eaten by a giant spider when I was twelve?"

"That was a giant spider," Darcy said.

"It had much smaller children it was going to share us with!" Ron shouted.

"What in the world is going on?" Hermione said as she made it to the top of the stairs. "Merlin, that's a lot of spiders."

"Thank you!" Ron exclaimed. "Darcy decided to decorate for Halloween, strictly with spiders, and when I told her about my phobia, she laughed."

Hermione sighed. "Yeah, this is going to be a problem."

"Hermione!" Darcy protested. "You're supposed to be the rational one!"

"Darcy, how hard would it to change at least half of these spiders into something different?"

Darcy sighed. "But I love my spiders. They're cute and make the apartment spooky."

"You know what else would make the apartment spooky? Bats," Ron said.

Darcy turned to Hermione. "How much exaggeration is in Ron's almost eaten by a giant spider story?"

"None," Hermione said. "He and our friend Harry were in the Forbidden Forest, and they were almost eaten by our friend Hagrid's pet giant spider and her children. I've seen the memory, it was absolutely terrifying." She paused. "Look, inevitably it's your flat, and you can do what you want. We can move Ron to a wizarding establishment farther way from the Tower if we need to."

Darcy sighed and looked between the two magical people. And sighed. "Fine, you can change half of the spiders into something else. But not all of them. Is that a fair compromise?"

Ron smiled. "It is." He pulled out his wand and transfigured all the larger spiders around the flat into bats. "There, fair?"

Darcy rolled her eyes. "Fair."

"Thank you, Darcy," Hermione said, giving her a smile. "You didn't have to do that."

"Yes I did," Darcy said. "Or else my roommate is going to leave, and then I'll never hear the end of it from Jane or Thor. So, no big deal, really."

"Well, regardless, thank you," she turned to Ron. "I need to get back, but meet me at five for dinner?"

Ron nodded. "Yeah, have a good rest of your day."

He bent down and gave her a peck and then Hermione was off.

"You gonna stay out there all day, Red?" Darcy asked.

Ron shook his head, and moved in, ducking under the large bat that now hung in the doorway before shutting the door behind him.

"So," Darcy said as soon as he was in the flat. "How big was this spider, really?"


End file.
